Sometimes My Life Sucks

So far my time in college has been marked by some pretty crazy shit. Yes college is a lot of fun, but alas not for everyone. Yesterday, my friend told me he is dropping out after one semester and he has already enlisted in the infantry. He will be on the front lines in Afghanistan sometime in 2010. I hope he kicks a lot of ass over there. Still, that is not the point of this entry. No, a lot of people come to college and think, "hey I'll study maybe get my balls licked on the weekends, and it'll be great." Well my friends, this is not at all the case. Who would have thought that getting with girls in college actually takes work.

Today I found out that the older girl said, "I would get with him (me) maybe if I was drunk and on like a million drugs." Hmm, that gives me an idea. No, but seriously this setback is just that, a setback. Now while I do not plan on giving her drugs or alcohol in order to get with her, I do still plan on getting with her. It will not be easy, but I am the kind of guy that likes a challenge. So now I'm listening to Eric Clapton's Have You Ever Loved a Woman and I am asking myself that exact question.

I was actually thinking about this sometime earlier today, and again at the Chinese buffet tonight. I think I did love a girl once, but she broke my young heart. I think you know that you love someone when you do dumb things, and feel like you can open yourself up to them. Loving someone is tough especially when they don't love you back. I opened myself to this girl, and she left me because she didn't feel the same way. Ever since then I have been very hesitant to go down that road again. Now my journey with the opposite sex is marked by one thing: sex. Seems like girls these days aren't looking for a good loving guy anymore. Especially on a college campus they are just looking to have a good time. Don't get me wrong I am too. Maybe its just this cold weather, but every year around this time I get the feeling that I am missing something. It seems to me that that something that is missing is a woman who loves me. Thats something right?

I don't know. I know I love to have sex, and maybe thats all there is anymore. I just need a hand to hold onto every once in a while. It's kind of depressing. Ah this is becoming a depressing blog. Fuck!

Okay well I'll spice this post up a little bit if you haven't already stopped reading. So I'll tell you a story. One night I was DDing for the fraternity, and I was stopping by the house in between rides just to see how everything was going. A couple girls I know had hit me up to see if there was a party at the house that night, and of course there was. One of these girls I had been trying to get with for a while, and she ended up going upstair s and getting massively drunk. Every time I came back to the house she would say things like, "Come and play with me. Why won't you play with me?" In the kind of voice that is basically begging me to fuck her. Unfortunately, the brothers came first and as I continued driving, I continued to miss out. By the time I got back homegirl was wasted, and while I was parking the car I saw her walking out of the house arm in arm with one of my pledge brothers. I thought to myself, "FUCK ME." I knew exactly what was going to happen, and sure enough the next day I found out that I was right.

Homegirl had fucked my pledge brother, and it could have been me...

Damn it this story was depressing too. Maybe it wouldn't been so depressing if I had ended up pounding her, but that wasn't what ended up happening. Damn sometimes my life sucks. I can't remember, but I probably ended up masturbating that night so I guess thats half as good.