Okay so here is a lesson that you will probably learn early on in college. FSU has a lot to offer, and if there is one good thing it is the amount of hot chicks on campus. Everyday when I walk around or even just take a peak out onto Landis Green there are so many. For this reason, any self respecting guy should never have to resort to hooking up with a fat chick. I learned a long time ago the ways of the fat chick, and believe me they are a sly breed.
With 60% of the student population being female you are bound to run into one every once in a while. A lot of guys think hey she's being nice, so I'll be nice back. This gentlemen is a mistake. Never fall for the just being nice angle, you will always get fucked. An important thing to remember is to never get too drunk at a party where there is a fat chick because you may do something you regret. Fat chicks purposly go on the prowl at parties looking for the guy who looks like he might be getting a little too drunk, and then when the moment is right, they pounce. Don't be that guy fellas.
If you have good friends then they will look out for you, but don't depend on it. Keep your eyes peeled because the Fat Chick is out there and she is waiting. Be sure to set some ground rules ahead of time with your bros so they will know what to look for. Tell them that under no circumstances should you be involved with any fat chicks. Tell them that even if you are locked in a room and the fat chick has you naked and is totally taking advantage of your drunken ass, you do not want it. Even if you look like you do, even if you beg them not to. Your friends will know what to do.
I once heard a story about a fat chick that had a guy locked in a room, completely wasted, completely naked, basically raping him, and his friends were still able to rescue him. Those bastards went above and beyond the call of duty to rescue their friend. They banged on the locked door nearly breaking it down (breaking down a door is worth it if it means saving your friend). Finally, they broke a window and burst into the room, pulled the kids naked ass out of the bed and carried him to safety. It is worth it fellas. Fucking worth it.
Okay so here are some more things to remember. Fat chicks like to spread rumors about themselves. One of the biggest rumors is that fat chicks give great head. Well I'm sorry to have to admit this, but I feel its nessesary so that it wont happen again. I know from experience that this is not true. Fat chicks really don't give great head. I'm quoting the late great College Life here, but the truth is that fat chicks started this rumor because they need some leverage. They're fat, they need it. I mean you can't really blame them. Still, that doesn't mean you have to fall for it. Don't be another victim.
To sum it all up, there really aren't any pros, and the cons are too long to list so just remember to steer clear of THE FAT CHICK.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment